Stream of Unconscious

Often I wake in the middle of the night with thoughts and visions that must be written. A lot of it may seem like mere rambling, but I am a born writer; I need to see what happens to my words once they stare back at me from the pages of my computer screen. Since I am ususally more than half-asleep when this happens, I jokingly entitled the original document: "Stream of Unconscious." Now that I am finally starting to publish in a blog (as so many people have suggested I should do!), I thought the title remained appropriate.

Sunday, May 13, 2007

WWJD: We Want Jelly Donuts!

Hello, friends!

It's a sleepy Sunday morning. I have to remember to make coffee here because they've started closing the snack table at church as soon as worship starts. Apparently, there were some people who were coming late for church, getting coffee and donuts, hanging out until the singing was over, and then just slipping in for the sermon. The scandal is outrageous. But we can't do that anymore, because there are no snacks after like, 10:30. So we're going late to church instead, and I'm bringing my own coffee.

You may think "that's terrible," but really, you haven't heard the music. Sometimes its pretty awful. And there's this one girl on the "worship team" I kinda make fun of... a lot. And I figure it's best just to not give myself an opportunity to be unkind on a Sunday morning, because every time I think: "I'm really going to prepare my heart for worship this time..." and I'll try, and every time I make fun of that girl; rocking back and forth and shaking her head from side to side, hands clasped, with her eyes closed. I think going late to church is one of my ways of "cutting off my right hand," so-to-speak, because I'm tempted to sin (and I always cave!).

So I've got a few questions for the masses. Is going to church a little unenethusiastically better than not going at all? Does that just mean I need to find a new church? Am I a weirdo Christian, or are half the people sitting there thinking: "I wish they still had donuts out... man, that girl just won't stop swaying... does she really mean that enraptured expression or is she just faking?... gas is so expensive right now, I wonder if I should have come?"

Many years ago, I had a friend named Martin who challenged my shaky belief system by pointing at my electric purple WWJD bracelet and saying: "We want jelly donuts!" I was horrified, convinced he was being sacreligious. Now, probably ten years later, I find myself disappointed that they close the snack table early so people will be on time for worship.

In all seriousness, though, I realize that many Christians in the world are very sincere about their faith, and very dedicated to their church. I have been a little nomadic about church, and maybe I'm just not getting the big picture. But I have never felt like I fit in a church, like I really had a "church family," like I was connected enough that people cared whether I was there or not. Maybe, because my current church is an hour away, I am just not able to be involved enough to give and recieve in the way a church family is supposed to fuction. But I think it may be more than that. I'm not convinced that the problem is just me.

Is there something wrong with the church in general here? Are there churches that don't function this way?

Don Miller believes that the church in America in general is pretty messed up. Is there any more literature I need to discover on the subject?

Any thoughts, comments, shared experiences?
I'd love feedback!

3 comments:

Unknown said...

I am completely shocked and offended by this blog! And, as your brother, I have to say that I actually thought it was hilarious and I never knew you were so gifted as a cynic. This should give me something else fun to do when I'm bored at work. Thanks!

brd said...

Sunday I found a church in Louisville, KY, that is a church I would actually say is a church. Catch their blog. Also notice that son Steven's pix is on that blog. This church is filled with such a wonderfully diverse group of people from homeless to highbrow. You may drink coffee during the service there. I know this is the case because someone spilled and they had to bring out the mop during the exchange of the "Peace."

Anonymous said...

My advice to you would be to read 'Velvet Elvis' by Rob Bell. It is an incredible book about the christian faith and what it actually means. I think many people are struggling with the concept of church that we have now, and working on doing something about it. If you liked Don Miller, you would also probably like books by Shane Claiborne, Jon Eldredge and the rest of Rob Bells' books. (Sorry, I love books and these are authors who have had a great impact on my life as well as so many of my friends)Happy reading :)