Stream of Unconscious

Often I wake in the middle of the night with thoughts and visions that must be written. A lot of it may seem like mere rambling, but I am a born writer; I need to see what happens to my words once they stare back at me from the pages of my computer screen. Since I am ususally more than half-asleep when this happens, I jokingly entitled the original document: "Stream of Unconscious." Now that I am finally starting to publish in a blog (as so many people have suggested I should do!), I thought the title remained appropriate.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Singles Awareness Day

It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be... spending the evening alone. In years past it has been torture, but I guess I've been maturing, finally. I know better how to handle my own heart these days, and I knew I couldn't sit around in my apartment, calling people and hoping someone would be able to hang out. I knew I just had to go...

I would have just driven all night if I didn't have to work tomorrow. I'm in a "driving kind of mood" tonight. I think I must have a little gypsie blood in me from some forgotten relative, because sometimes I just can't take it anymore. Sometimes I just have to pick up and go. And as much as I hate moving, the change usually does me good in the end. So maybe I'm just made to uproot and go as my world changes. Maybe I'm not meant to have a "home" persay, and that's why I've never found one. It's a thought, at least...

So I didn't have a date for Valentine's Day, and the world hasn't ended yet. I'm not entirely convinced that I'd have wanted one. I haven't been super impressed with the guys who've been interested in me lately. And I tend to really throw myself into the relationship when I'm in one, and right now I think I need to get used to living with me before I think about having someone else in my world. And yes... I am trying to convince myself while I'm typing this. =]

But over all, I am really doing well. It was a beautiful day, and there's nothing wrong with taking yourself out on a date every once in awhile. I went to see Spiderwick Chronicles, and loved it! I want to write stories like that someday... I wonder why I can't write them now? I'm still a mystery, even to myself.

Hopefully, the guy that finds me in the end will enjoy a good mystery/romance/thriller. =]

Great, now I've got Michael Jackson in my head for the rest of the night...

1 comment:

brd said...

Long time no see. I've been to Budapest since I saw you. In fact I think I was there for Valentine's Day.